May 24, 2008

Kermit Does Not Wear Pants

Long weekends are difficult for the hermit in me. I know I need to get my ass out the door and do things. Fun! Exciting! Things! Yet the Hermit says stay in, it is so hot out there. There are Fun! Exciting! Things! to do inside the doors.

A couple months ago, we had talked about going to float the river over Memorial Day weekend. I have not done this in several years. Beer, water, swimsuits. Beer helps make you forget how that swimsuit looks on you. But, as it got closer, we decided not to do that. Which may be good in light of how fat pansies are.

The in-laws were planning on coming into town today. I found out about a new display at the Natural Science Museum for the mens to hang out at. The girls, well, we could find something to do, I am sure.

Last night we indulged in beer. Copious amounts. And then some. We slept until noon. I knew that I had lots of cleaning to do in preparation for the arrival of the in-laws. I have been repeatedly told by Not Craig to chillax. His parents don’t care if the house is clean. They probably wouldn’t even notice. In my mind, that translates into, “Blah, blah, blah”. I needed to clean. So I would not panic when they knocked on the door. I had to buy groceries. I had things to do. So when I woke up at noon, feeling like warmed poo, I tried to step it up and do things. And I did. I made coffee and sat on the couch.

Then the call came.

They cancelled.

So now, my plans are shipwrecked. I do not have to clean, or shop, or entertain.

Now what?

I still feel icky. I have no clue as to what we should do this weekend now. Thoughts? Ideas? I am not opposed to being a hermit and not showering for 3 days and not leaving the house. Ever.

I am of the opinion that Not Craig will not permit this. He does not share the hermit-y factor like I do.

And if it wouldn’t be too much trouble, could ya’ll post some things. I need something to read when I stubbornly glue myself to this chair for the next 72 hours.

P.S. This posting was interrupted by the urging of Not Craig to shower and go see the new Indiana Jones movie. That requires pants. That is not the weekend I have embraced in the past hour. A weekend without pants, that is.


Southern Doll said...

When I was little, my brother and I would watch America's Funniest Home Videos together. Our favorite was the section on funny signs. One day. They showed a sign of a hotel advertising their "Indoor Heated Pool." Except a letter had fallen off, so the sign read "Indoor Heated Poo." This made me laugh so hard I cried, and to this day, my brother can grin at me and say "INDOOR HEATED POO!!!" and I crack up. Your warmed poo comment just reminded me of that, and I laughed.

Kaytabug said...

No spoilers please. I am looking fwd to seeing that movie! I have let the boys watch the old ones just recently! I think if I had tried to show them those movies before all the advertising they would have not liked it so much. I guess we'll never know.

There will be another post for your reading pleasure in the Am. I heart this scheduled posting shit.

sophie said...

We drove past that very tubing place on our way back from Kerrville folk festival. I got out of my Kermit stance for a weekend...posting to follow.

sophie said...

Oh yeah, did you like the movie?? I do not swoon over many, but Harrison Ford still does it for me.

Sauntering Soul said...

I was a semi-hermit this weekend. I went and picked up my niece Saturday afternoon for a while and then we went to my Dad's for his birthday.

Sunday I finally left my house at 3:00 and went and walked around an arts festival until I thought my face was going to slide off from sweating so much. Then my mom and I drove around to look at some houses (she's looking for a new house) and I got back home around 9:00.

I didn't leave my house yesterday and it was all I could do to make myself take a shower. But I did paint a couple of pictures. I couldn't be bothered with getting on my computer and posting anything after I did my Fun Monday post Sunday night though. Sorry.

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