May 28, 2008

I would like 4 Spicy Chicken Sandwiches, a Southern Style Chicken Sandwich, 2 Medium Fries, 2 Medium Cokes, a Hamburger and a Cinnamon Melt

Is everyone aware that your auteur is a redhead? I am a redhead of the palest variety. I am translucent. I buy the absolute lightest makeup ever and it still gives my face a nice tan.

Growing up, me, Kaytabug, and our group of blogless friends all had season passes to our town’s swimming pool. We would go every day. For hours. We would spend all afternoon at the pool. If we weren’t in the pool, we would be riding our bikes around town in the hot sun. Although I have no memory of it, I must have worn some type of sunscreen since I don’t remember a completely blistered existence. Although there were a couple of blister incidents….

Did you just feel that cold chill courtesy of skin cancer? In the past, I have gone to the dermatologist, who spent less time than I have spent at a pap smear, examining my entire freckle ridden body and declared me clear. Suspect, if you ask me.

On Monday, while I was playing Kermit, my love, Not Craig, went to hang out with a friend at the pool. Not Craig is the pigmented one in our relationship. However, if you look at him today, you would wonder...

Rock Lobster.

This is not a post to make fun of him, or to point out the dangers of that evil orb in the sky (although it is evil. Very very evil.). This post is about something else altogether.

I think.

When I was just barely out of high school, one of my best friends burned herself severely. Life Flight severe. Because this blog is all about me and my needs and my wants and my funnies, without going into all the details of it, I would just like to say that burning is one of the scariest, most frightening experiences one could undergo in the category of Things Requiring Hospitalization. For me, as a friend, it was terrifying. I saw what she went through immediately after, the days and weeks after, the months, years, etc. And I know how it frightened me, which is about a gazillion times less than how it affected her. That is some scary shit.

When she was burned, I learned that one of the big things about burns is that the healing process requires mucho calories. She was eating all the time. It was awesome. I was so jealous. Which is what this blog post is actually about.

So, when Not Craig shows up burned as can be, just like if he had a cold, you have to feed it.

I went to McD’s last night after picking up a movie for us to watch.

We watched the movie. And then I returned to McD's.

I don’t think the caregiver is also required to ingest extra calories for the healing process.

But I am not taking any chances. Feel the love. (Handles).

5 comments:

Sauntering Soul said...

I am also pasty white. In fact, when I went to the dermatologist last week he said "you are really, really, really fair skinned and you're lucky you're not covered in moles". Lucky indeed because I don't particularly want to be covered in moles.

And since I've gone vegetarian I don't really go to fast food places anymore. Please tell me what a Cinnamon Melt is! That sounds vegetarian....

Sauntering Soul said...

P.S. My grandfather used to swear by taking a bath and adding apple cider vinegar to the water when you had a bad sunburn. Apparently it will take some of the sting out and prevent you from peeling so bad. Maybe Not Craig wants to be a guinea pig? If he does, let me know if it really works since I avoid the sun and won't get to test it out.

sophie said...

Count me as one of the very pale as well. Iremember having to wear a t-shirt over my bathing suit as a kid. The only sunscreen was called Pre-Sun and I can still remember the brown bottle and the horrible oily smell. THese kids today have it easy with all the newfangled sunscreens!

Kaytabug said...

LMAO! Hilarious! Now I am hungry! I'm thinking McD's for lunch! But a homemade breakfast taco right now!
Then work, work, work!!

Green said...

Interesting - I'd never heard this thing about feeding a burn...

 
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